May 5th, 2017

Today is my six month surgiversary! I am in total disbelief that six months has come and gone since I was able to receive this tool. Some days that tool is my best friend and other days it is mentally my absolute worst enemy but I am a so thankful that I have it on either day.

Today someone thanked me for being an inspiration to their children with tears in her eyes! And just last week I had another tell me that she follows this blog and enjoys reading about my journey. While I chose the journey for myself I chose to share this with everyone for another reason: to inspire change.

The day of my surgery I was terrified! I put on my bravest face and lied through my teeth to anyone who asked. My insides were in a thousand knots and I was so afraid I was making the wrong decision. I had heard horror stories about “failed” procedures and complications. I had friends and family who I knew, while they supported me, were scared for me. Luckily, I had others who had inspired me, success stories that made me believe I could face these demons and change my life.

I am blessed to have close friends who have went through this process or similar processes whom I was able to ask questions, talk to about my fears and just have their support in general. I also found inspiration through online blogs, YouTube, & insta. I am fortunate to live in a time where weight loss surgery isn’t as taboo or crazy as it once was.

Weight loss surgery is not the easy out or fix all. It is hard work, every single day. It’s pushing yourself past mental and physical limits. It requires looking inside yourself to deal with all your emotions that led you to where you are. It’s handling negative comments and backhanded compliments with as much class and grace as you can muster up. It’s knowing some will always be waiting for you to fail. It’s fear of becoming another negative story for people to gossip about.

All too often we all hear about the negatives of this and that. People remember the bad over the good more often than not. It’s like the old saying goes “No one remembers all your achievements, but mess up one time and no one will let you forget. ” I didn’t want my story to be one of those negative stories, but I did want it to be heard.

And here I am, six months after surgery and just a week shy of a year since I decided to dedicate myself as much as possible to this lifestyle change. I have been successful thus far, even with bad days. I have changed for the better, even without the support of some. I have worked hard and am proud of myself, even though I still have days where this journey is a struggle.

When I first started this blog I had no intentions of actually sharing it with the world. For many months only one or two others knew I had even been documenting my thoughts, feelings, fears, etc. Just as I do not regret my decision to have this surgery I do not regret my decision to share my story. The good, bad and in between. If this can inspire one person to change their life, not just have surgery, but change their life in ANY aspect then I have been a success.

Current Weight: 265

Highest Weight: 398